Troll 2 (1990) Much has been said about this poorly acted, poorly written non-sequel. Happily, there’s just never enough to say because there are so many standout moments. From the goofy troll heads that look nothing like the creatures at the left to whenever grandpa Seth’s apparition appears, Troll 2 is a curiosity from start to finish. As a result, this genuinely naive effort earns its recognition as one of the best worst movies in history.

What would have drastically improved Troll 2 is if the creatures–who live in the town of Nilbog which is Goblin backwards–were shown transforming from human and back again. Half the time they are shown as human but usually when doing their “bidding” or eating they are trolls or goblins or whatever. At least Troll 2 could afford to include a girl melting into green goo which is then eaten by the…troblins? golls? See, they make the humans eat green hamburgers or funky cakes with green frosting. This changes the victim into a green vegetable mass which the trobs can now eat. This is because the environmentally conscious troblins are VEGETARIANS. [rating: $9] –Kenyon

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